Monday, January 17, 2011

Where's Superwoman?

So yesterday I'm getting ready for church and I put on my Superman underwear and I'm dancing around striking Superman poses. Hands on hips, feet planted firmly, looking off into the distance. My wife is watching me and laughing. She's all "what else does he do besides stand there?" So I proceed to show off my Up, Up and Away skills. She had the nerve to say to me "Superman is lame. He doesn't have real powers" WHAT?? Superman is NOT lame. "Well what can he do?", she asks. Um HELLO, he's faster than a speeding bullet and he can leap tall buildings in a single bound. "What else?" He melts things with his EYES! Like bzzzzzzztttt. Yes I was making the sound effects. She looked unimpressed.

"What about Superwoman?" There is no Superwoman. "Why not?" because there is Supergirl. And Wonder Woman. "Oh yeah, Wonder Woman. What's her deal?" She's like an Amazon princess from a hidden island and she came to America to help us do something. Uh, in the government. "What does she do?", she asks, clearly amused at my geekiness and righteous indignation. She had bracelets, that bounce bullets, I tell her as I proceed to demonstrate reflecting said bullets off my wrists. Oh! and the lasso of truth! Ok, by now she is really laughing. "Oh and the invisible plane, right?" I kinda flinch, 'cuz yah, that's kinda silly in the TV show how the plane is all invisible but she's sitting there flying along. Yah I say, there is that. "Ok, go get ready for church my cute little geek", she says and I go up, up and away to finish getting ready.


  1. Ok...does anyone rememeber Plastic Man? He could be stretched and stretched and stretched (that's really all I remember about him)????

  2. Ok true story here: When I was a kid I had one of those. Somehow it broke open and this jelly stuff came out and me, being me, I tasted it. It was freaking good. So I squirted it all out and froze pieces of it and sold it to my friends. We are all going to die from some rare form of Cancer I'm sure!